old milwaukee-since 1934

So, someone told me that I look like that broad from the vampire movie with that pantysoaker British dude today.
Um, maybe if she was fat & wearing a mask over her head but whatever,dude, thanks for the compliment.
I'm so not into that dude, for whatever reason.
Feels like the older I get the more I'm feeling like I'd rather fuck the Middle Eastern dude at the canned goods emporium/iced tea store. I find him attractive cuz he asks me about my day & gave me a free lighter.
It's just like a-no one is hot anymore & b-I hate talking to people so it's highly likely that I will never again have a boyfriend in my whole life. That's not a wholly unappealing idea to me, its just like: you gotta kinda work to get someone interested & I'm fucken lazy.

Life is not like that stupid "Hes Not Into You" movie or "P.S. I Love You" (which I LOVE to talk about when I'm drunk)......you don't like accidentally bump into a handsome stranger on the subway & he finds yr bizness card & tracks you down far & wide while adventures ensue until you kiss on the Eiffel Towe or whatever bullshit.
You bump into an old Jamaican man who yells at you for not letting folks outta the train first & then you sit in embarrassed silence on the way home cuz you forgot yr phone & Ipod at home that morning.

I dunno, Im moving soon & stuff is all changing around at work so I feel kinda disconnected & retarded for now.
Maybe I'll spruce up my new place & find myself some hot piece of summer boyfriend. I love the idea of a summer boyfriend-someone I can shave my legs for who can take me on dates.....

I'm lying-I've never been on a date & don't plan on starting at 27 & also-I'm doing it already with the hottest piece of non-boyfriend I know & fuck , I haven't shaved my legs in months.

Either way, I guess the point of this nonsensical little blog is that I want summer to come hard & fast. As well as my new summer bf.
im funny!